Add a cross-instance self-ID registry to identity.ts so isSelf() can
recognize the current user's Snowflake IDs from all connected instances.
Previously, federated DMs showed the user themselves as the other party
because remote-instance IDs didn't match the home user ID.
- Register user IDs from every WS ready event (home + remote)
- Clear the registry on session reset (login/logout/register/delete)
- Fix isSelf() username comparison to parse both sides as federated
- Replace naive ID check in MessageList WelcomeHeader with isSelf()