Friends fan-out (loadFriends/loadRequests) now waits for all remote
connections to establish before querying, fixing the empty friends list
when logged into a remote instance as a federated user.
- Add _autoConnectDone wait guard to loadFriends, loadRequests, and
loadFederatedMutuals (same pattern as discoverStore)
- Add concurrency guards to prevent thundering herd from multiple
ready events firing simultaneous fan-outs
- Fix deduplication to use canonical identity (homeUserId ?? id)
instead of id:origin, preventing duplicate entries for the same
user across instances
- Auto-connect to home instance when logged in as a federated user,
with registry entry so it appears in Connections UI
- Allow re-adding error/disconnected instances in probeInstance