diff --git a/packages/server/src/db/migrate.ts b/packages/server/src/db/migrate.ts
index 61c98162..6724799c 100644
--- a/packages/server/src/db/migrate.ts
+++ b/packages/server/src/db/migrate.ts
@@ -789,19 +789,9 @@ export function runMigrations(db: Database.Database): void {
 
         let reason: string | null = null;
 
-        // Criterion 1: shared 1-on-1 DM membership
-        if (!reason) {
-          const shared = db.prepare(`
-            SELECT m1.dm_channel_id
-            FROM dm_members m1
-            JOIN dm_members m2 ON m1.dm_channel_id = m2.dm_channel_id
-            JOIN dm_channels c ON c.id = m1.dm_channel_id
-            WHERE m1.user_id = ? AND m2.user_id = ?
-              AND c.owner_id IS NULL
-            LIMIT 1
-          `).get(a.id, b.id) as { dm_channel_id: string } | undefined;
-          if (shared) reason = `shared 1-on-1 DM channel ${shared.dm_channel_id}`;
-        }
+        // Criterion 1 removed: "shared 1-on-1 DM membership" was wrong —
+        // two users from the same domain sharing a DM channel doesn't mean
+        // they're duplicates, it means they're having a conversation.
 
         // Criterion 2: username cross-reference
         if (!reason) {
diff --git a/packages/server/src/routes/federation.ts b/packages/server/src/routes/federation.ts
index 20fde9fd..86f6473d 100644
--- a/packages/server/src/routes/federation.ts
+++ b/packages/server/src/routes/federation.ts
@@ -1208,8 +1208,17 @@ export async function federationRoutes(app: FastifyInstance): Promise<void> {
           sourceUrl: `${localOrigin}/api/uploads/${a.filename}`,
         }));
 
+        // Include federatedId for group DMs so the peer uses the correct
+        // channel lookup path instead of computing a 1-on-1 pair hash.
+        const syncChannel = db
+          .select({ federatedId: schema.dmChannels.federatedId, ownerId: schema.dmChannels.ownerId })
+          .from(schema.dmChannels)
+          .where(eq(schema.dmChannels.id, mutation.context_id))
+          .get();
+
         events.push({
           eventType: mutationType,
+          ...(syncChannel?.federatedId && syncChannel.ownerId ? { federatedId: syncChannel.federatedId } : {}),
           dmChannelId: mutation.context_id,
           messageId: message.id,
           encryptionVersion: 0,
@@ -1550,6 +1559,13 @@ function backfillHomeUserId(
   db: ReturnType<typeof getDb>,
 ): typeof schema.users.$inferSelect {
   if (user.homeUserId === homeUserId) return user;
+  // Only backfill if the user has no homeUserId yet. If they already have a
+  // DIFFERENT non-null homeUserId, this means the wrong user was matched —
+  // overwriting would corrupt their identity.
+  if (user.homeUserId) {
+    console.warn(`[federation] Refusing to overwrite homeUserId on user ${user.id} (${user.username}): existing=${user.homeUserId}, incoming=${homeUserId}`);
+    return user;
+  }
   db.update(schema.users)
     .set({ homeUserId })
     .where(eq(schema.users.id, user.id))